His Redeeming Bride Page 6

  “But she warned me to be good and I wasn’t.”

  He closed his eyes. Why was he learning about this now? If he had any idea Cassie was making Emily feel this way, he would have made sure she didn’t do it again. “Your mother didn’t mean that. She was upset because of her aunt.”

  “She said it before we found out about her aunt.”

  “When did she say it?”

  “Many times.”

  Pulling back from her, he took her face in his hands and looked into her eyes. “I want you to listen to me, Emily. You didn’t make your mother leave. Your mother had problems that you had no control over. It was those problems that made her say those things, not you. You’re a good girl. Do you understand?”

  She swallowed and nodded.

  “Good.” He urged her to lie back down and tucked the blanket around her shoulders. “I love you very much. There’s nothing that’s going to change that, all right?”

  “I love you too, Pa.”

  Smiling, he kissed her forehead and stood up. “I want you to get a good night’s sleep.”

  After he shut the door, he stormed to the kitchen and yanked open the drawer that he kept the stationary and pencils in. He pulled out a sheet of paper and pencil and slammed the drawer shut. Plopping into a chair, he gripped the pencil and wrote a letter to Cassie. He knew where her new husband lived since John McCarthy’s wealth made his name and address easily accessible to anyone who cared to check. He hadn’t corresponded with Cassie since that day at the courthouse when he granted her the divorce she wanted, but finding out what she had told Emily was too much.

  As he wrote to Cassie, he didn’t hold anything back. He didn’t speak on his behalf, but he wrote concerning Emily, defending her the best way he knew how, realizing that his words might not make any difference. But he had to get them off his chest, and Cassie had to know the damage she caused. Someone had to stand up for that little girl plagued with guilt and longing. He sealed the letter in an envelope and put it on the table. He would make a trip to town and mail it out tomorrow.

  He returned the pencil to the drawer and slammed it. The sound of footsteps turned his attention to Sarah who carried Luke down the stairs. His anger cooled. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

  “You didn’t wake me. I was thirsty so I came down to get some water.”

  He watched her as she slowly made her way to the cupboard. She looked as if she was about to collapse.

  “I’ll pour the water for you.”

  He rushed to the cupboard and retrieved a cup. He poured the water into it. Handing it to her, he frowned when she kept her eyes on the cup. She thanked him and took the cup, her hand shaking.

  “Why won’t you look me in the eye?” he asked.

  Her cheeks flushed as she set the cup on the table. Luke squirmed in her arms and grunted. When she cleared her throat and looked at him, finally making purposeful eye contact with him, it dawned on him just how tired she was. No amount of exhaustion could hide her beauty. But he noted the circles under her eyes, her sagging shoulders, and the stray strands of blond hair that fell out of her bun.

  She seemed small and helpless. Gone was the defiant, rude woman who made him feel like a criminal. His heart went out to her. Of course, she was tired. She lost her husband, gave birth, lost her home, and worked hard to cook supper and cleaned Emily’s bedroom. On top of that, she had a newborn to care for. A lot had happened to her over the past three days.

  “Can I hold him?” he softly asked.

  She glanced at her baby who wiggled in her arms, and for a moment, Neil thought she would refuse, but she nodded and gently placed the boy in his arms. She rubbed her muscles. “I know he doesn’t seem heavy but I’m sore.”

  “Why don’t you sit down and rest?”

  She took the cup and eased into one of the kitchen chairs. She sipped the water but didn’t look his way.

  A smile spread across his face as Luke fussed, his nose scrunching and his hands haphazardly hitting his face. He knew right away what Luke’s problem was. The blanket wasn’t wrapped tightly around him. Neil brought him to the table and gently laid him on it so he could adjust the blanket. Once the soft yellow blanket fit him like a cocoon, Luke sighed and settled down. Neil picked him up and held him, enjoying the feel of a baby in his arms. He had forgotten how nice a baby could be.

  “Will you teach me how to swaddle him in that blanket?” Sarah asked, her voice so quiet Neil had to strain to hear her.

  “Yes.” Sitting across from her, he noticed she still averted her gaze from his. “Why don’t you look at me?”

  Turning the cup in her hands, she said, “I don’t deserve the kindness you’re showing me.”

  He hadn’t expected that answer. He figured she was ashamed to be in the same house with him. Though she had apologized to him earlier that day, he hadn’t been sure if she meant it or said it to manipulate him as Cassie had done many times until he caught onto her schemes. However, there was nothing sly in the way Sarah spoke. He sensed her sincerity and appreciated it. It was one of the nicest things anyone had said to him in a long time.

  “Let’s forget about the last three days,” he offered.

  She looked at him then, and the relief on her face warmed his heart, making him aware that he had said the right thing. “Thank you, Mr. Craftsman. I’m sorry I misjudged you.”

  He smiled. “You can call me Neil. We might as well be on a first name basis since we’ll be sharing a house.”

  “Then you should call me Sarah.”

  “I will.” Feeling like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders, he grinned at the baby who stared at him with wide dark blue eyes. “He’s a good looking boy. Why did you name him Luke?”

  She shrugged. “I liked the name.” Then she took another sip from the cup.

  “I forgot how small Emily was when she was born. I remember staying up at night and staring at her. I wasn’t sure what to make of her at first.” A low chuckle resonated from his throat. “I don’t think she knew what to make of me either, to be honest. But we bonded and I can’t imagine my life without her.”

  She furrowed her brows. “It’s odd for a man to stay up with a baby. That’s what a woman does.”

  Sighing, he decided to ignore the comment. He didn’t feel like explaining Cassie’s lack of interest in Emily.

  As if Sarah understood the reason for his silence, she returned to the cup and drank the rest of the water before talking. “Can I ask why you named her Emily?”

  “For the same reason you named him Luke. I liked the name.”

  “It’s a good name.” She brushed back a few strands of her hair behind her ear. “Do you think I should tell her that I won’t try to take her mother’s place? I don’t wish to upset her.”

  “I’ll explain it to her. It must be a shock to her. She’s not used to having anyone but me and her grandmother around. She thinks that her mother’s going to come back but she’s not. That’s why we got a divorce.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  He brought the baby up to his shoulder and patted his back. Looking ahead at the beige wall in front of him, he shrugged. “There’s nothing to be done about it now. She wanted to leave and I let her.” The baby burped, the action serving to lighten the mood a bit. He settled the baby back into his arms.

  Her gaze drifted to her son. “You handle a baby well.”

  A slight smile graced her lips, making her especially pretty in the light of the kerosene lamp. It’d been too long since he’d been around a woman. Naturally, he’d be sensitive to her presence. Uncomfortable, he turned his focus to Luke who continued to stare at him in open wonder. He grinned, recalling the hope that Emily had given him after she was born. That same hope shone in this boy’s eyes. How amazing that someone so small could affect him like this. Perhaps that was the nature of babies. To give hope...a new life...a second chance. Their lives loomed before them, as an unwritten slate. Hope. It was long overdue for him and for Emily.

&nbs
p; Sarah yawned. He looked up. She had propped her elbow on the table and rested her head in the palm of her hand. Her eyes grew heavy.

  “Why don’t you get some sleep? I’ll watch Luke for you.”

  She jerked up, her eyes wide. “Oh, I can’t inconvenience you. You have to get up early.”

  Sarah was a proud woman, one who worked hard. Maybe too hard. He recalled the work she had done in the short time she’d been there. He refused to let her go on without rest. “Let me help you. You barely got any sleep since you gave birth. If Luke gets hungry, I’ll bring him to you.”

  “It wouldn’t be right. It’s my job.”

  “You can’t do your job if you’re exhausted. I took care of Emily. I know what to do with a baby.”

  She opened her mouth, as if to ask a question but shut it, probably deciding whatever she was going to ask was none of her business. Easing out of the chair, she smoothed the skirt of her brown dress. “It would be nice to get more than three hours of sleep. All right. If you need anything, please wake me.”

  “I will. And I’ll make sure to take him to his bassinet in your room when he falls asleep. Tomorrow, I’ll take the tub to your room and fill it with hot water. I’m sure you could use a warm bath.”

  She swallowed and brushed her eyes. Whether the actions sprang from her feeling tired or the struggle to hold back tears, he couldn’t decipher. When she spoke, her voice was soft. “I don’t know how to thank you.”

  His heart warmed at her sincere words. What a refreshing change from the way she’d been earlier. He cleared the lump in his throat. “You just did.”

  She shot him a confused look but wished him a good night and climbed the steps, her movements slow, giving further evidence of her exhaustion. Something about her touched him, and for the first time, in a long time, he felt a glimmer of faith in a beautiful woman.

  Chapter Seven

  Two days later, Sarah put on her dark gray church dress and her matching hat. Gathering Luke in a blanket, she swaddled him the way Neil taught her to and carried him to the barn. Emily voiced a polite greeting in front of the wood building but didn’t smile.

  “It’s a lovely day,” Sarah said, noting the way the sunlight made Emily’s raven curls shine. She took in Emily’s pink dress and brown wool coat. Her pink hat fluttered in the breeze. Despite the cheer in her attire, she looked as if her entire world had collapsed around her. Hoping to lighten the mood, Sarah spoke. “That’s a pretty necklace.”

  Emily fingered the gold chain with a single pearl hanging from it. “My mother left it for me.” She looked up at Sarah with her chin sticking out, as if she was challenging her. “It means that she’s coming back.”

  Sorrow settled into the pit of her heart. How wrong this girl was. She placed her hand on the girl’s shoulder but Emily jerked away from her. “I’m sorry, Emily. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

  “She is coming back. I don’t care what anyone says.”

  Not sure of how to respond, Sarah finally nodded. “All right.” Arguing with the girl wouldn’t make any difference, and it certainly wouldn’t make it easier for either one of them to live in the house together. Though Sarah and Neil managed to come to a cordial relationship, she could tell that Emily would take longer to get along with. And who could blame a seven year old who wished for her mother to come home? Sarah rocked her alert baby. “Will you let me stay when she returns?”

  Emily stared at Ben who was getting the buggy ready for their trip into town. Though Ben and the horses remained at a good distance, Sarah heard him talking to one of the two geldings as if he were talking to a person. Sarah grinned. She liked Ben. He had a good heart.

  Emily’s loud sigh brought Sarah’s attention back to her. “Ma doesn’t like to cook or clean. Grandma did most of that, but if you did it, then I could spend more time with Grandma. I think Ma will be happy if you stayed.” She squinted at the sun before looking at Sarah. “All right. You can stay. But you have to sleep on the couch downstairs. My ma will need her room back. She needs her beauty rest and Pa’s snores keep her awake.”

  Sarah had heard Neil snoring when she went to the kitchen the night before, so she understood why Emily accepted that. She turned her attention to Neil as he exited the barn. He stopped by the geldings and said something to Ben. He wore a black suit and hat for church. The sight of him caused her heart to flutter. Quickly, she looked away, praying for forgiveness. Her husband’s burial would take place on Tuesday, for goodness’ sakes!

  “Are you ready?” Neil called out to them.

  Emily ran to the buggy. “Yes, Pa!”

  She leapt into his arms. He tossed her in the air and twirled her around. The scene was so wonderful that Sarah giggled. Emily squealed with delight and protested when he settled her on the seat. When he glanced Sarah’s way and waved her over, she caught the amusement in his eyes. There was something endearing about a man who adored his child. She had never seen a man who cared more for a child than Neil cared for Emily. Frowning, she recalled how Jim reacted to the news of her pregnancy. She could only imagine how he might have been as a father, and she found him sorely lacking.

  “If you wait any longer, we’ll be late,” Neil yelled.

  Blinking, she forced aside her unbidden thoughts and joined him and Emily, noticing that his farmhands climbed into a wagon. “Do they go to your church?” she asked Neil.

  He shook his head. “They go to the country church. I go to the one in town. It’s the same one my mother goes to. Which one do you go to?”

  She told him.

  “That’s on our way. Well, hop in.” He held his hand to help her onto the seat. Neil’s buggy was more comfortable than the wagon Jim owned. “Are you sure you feel well enough to ride all the way to town?”

  Pleased by his concern, she was quick to assure him that she felt fine. It was true she was still sore, but he and his mother had given her plenty of time to rest so she felt much better than she had two days ago.

  “If the road gets bumpy, let me know and I’ll go slower or try to find a smoother path.”

  Her face flushed when she realized he was still holding her hand. Even with their gloves on, she noted how well her hand fit in his. Determined to ignore the pleasant sensation, she said, “I’ll tell you.”

  He released her hand. She breathed a sigh of relief. She wasn’t comfortable with touching a man who wasn’t Jim. Not that Jim had touched her much. But still, he was her husband. She had no business liking another man’s touch, even if it was innocent. She softly cleared her throat and waited for Neil to sit next to Emily in the buggy. He snapped the reins. The horses began their lazy pace. The soft cushion in the buggy felt like heaven after enduring Jim’s hard wagon for ten years.

  Emily, who seemed much happier, chatted about her hope for snow, how she wished for Spring so flowers would appear, and how she wanted to go on the rope swing again. Neil kept a steady but careful pace and led the two horses to the smoother parts of the road, which Sarah was grateful for. The ride did tire her more than she anticipated, but she wanted to go to church so she didn’t complain.

  When Neil stopped on a vacant street that was four blocks from her church, he explained, “It’s best if you walk the rest of the way.” He pulled the brake, got out and helped her down. “What time does your church service end?”

  She told him. Before he walked away, she whispered, “Why are you letting me out here?”

  He glanced at Emily who seemed to be more interested in the lace on her dress than in their conversation. “I think it’s best if they didn’t see you with me.”

  He was right, she knew. If she was brave enough to disregard what people thought of her, she would tell him to drop her off in front of the church anyway. But she did care what they thought, and she didn’t want to have to explain why she was living in Neil Craftsman’s house. As he walked back to the buggy and got in beside Emily, she stepped back, unsure of how to respond.

  Neil peered at her, seeming undaunted by
the fact that he was shunned. “We don’t get out until twenty minutes after you do, so I suggest you stick around and talk to your friends, and then we’ll be waiting here for you. All right?”

  She nodded, ashamed that she was, in fact, relieved that he was willing to hide their situation from the rest of the world. She knew his mother wouldn’t say anything. That woman didn’t make it a habit of telling anything to anyone unless it was common knowledge. Perhaps her discretion stemmed from having a son who had engaged in ungodly activities. Her cheeks grew hot at the reminder. She knew he wasn’t the same man he was back then, but part of her had a difficult time looking beyond his past.

  As Neil clicked the reins on the geldings, she closed her eyes, trying not to cry. Of all people who treated her with kindness, it had to be the one person she didn’t want to be seen in public with. What kind of woman am I to deny him?

  Biting back a wave of self-loathing, she opened her eyes and turned to walk down the street, past the quiet park and closed businesses. She found her way to her white church where the people in her familiar world gathered inside to catch up on what was happening to everyone else. The only time Jim would touch her was when they arrived at the church. He held her arm. Of course, he patted her hand on occasion, but he only hugged her to initiate lovemaking.

  Those sessions didn’t come often. She didn’t care much for the grunting and huffing and puffing of the whole thing, and it seemed to her that it never lasted beyond a couple minutes. It was the only time he kissed her, which was why she looked forward to it. She didn’t know what was so great about it other than the holding and kissing. But since finding out about her pregnancy, he said there was no need to try for a baby and that was it. And she discovered that she didn’t miss it at all.

  Her face flushed with heat. She hated Jim. Stopping on the block that led to her church, she turned around. Maybe she should go to Neil’s church this morning. She didn’t care to be reminded of her husband. It didn’t occur to her how cold he had been until he left her to the mercy of two thieves.