The Bargain Mail Order Bride Page 12

Travis opened the door and stepped onto the porch. “I don’t think we’ll have many more days where we can enjoy being outside this year.”

  “Nope,” Eric replied, turning his attention to him. “Soon it’ll be too cold to do much of anything but stay inside and wait for spring. Though knowing you, you won’t notice. Not with all the time you spend out in your workshop making things.”

  Travis grinned. “I suppose it is to my advantage that I work inside, but I don’t spend all of my time working. Not anymore.”

  “It’s nice to see you finally living life instead of hiding from it,” Eric told him.

  “Allie’s been good for me. The girls have been, too. It’s nice to wake up and know you’re with people who accept you for who are instead of what you look like.”

  Carl didn’t understand why Travis insisted on making such a big deal out of the way he looked. So what if he had scars on his face? It didn’t make him ugly.

  Carl shouldn’t feel at odds with Travis. Travis had always been nice to him. Even while most of the people in town thought he’d murdered Lydia, Travis hadn’t. In fact, he owed Travis a lot since Travis had helped him when Jerry had threatened him. Travis and Eric had probably been the only two people who believed he was innocent during that difficult time in his life.

  So why did Carl experience a sudden burst of irritation with Travis? The answer came to him as soon as he thought of the question. Travis didn’t have to worry about Eric finding out his wife was an outlaw with a huge bounty on her head. He wasn’t harboring such a dark and terrible secret. So, of course, Travis could relax and enjoy this afternoon.

  “Are you alright, Carl?”

  Blinking out of his thoughts, Carl looked over at Travis. “I’m fine. I’m just thinking of when I can start panning for gold next spring, that’s all.” Yes, it was a lie, but it was better than telling them the truth.

  “I hate to be the one to mention this,” Eric began, “but what if there isn’t as much gold in that stream as you think there is?”

  Then his entire life would have been wasted, but Carl decided not to say that. Instead, he said, “My father was told the stream was rich in gold. It’s just a matter of finding it.”

  “But what if the gold isn’t there?” Eric asked. “Do you think you could be happy living here for the rest of your life?”

  “I’ve already discovered gold there,” Carl replied. “I just haven’t hit the area where there’s a lot of it.”

  “I don’t think that’s what Eric means,” Travis spoke up. “He wants to know if you can be happy if you don’t end up getting rich. What if you won’t be able to leave? Can you find a way to be content with staying here for the rest of your life?”

  “No,” Carl replied. “Juliet and I need to get out of here.”

  It wasn’t just him anymore. He had her to worry about, and there was no way he was going to risk her staying here. It was just a matter of time before another Wanted poster made its way to this town, the preacher remembered where he’d seen her face, or someone came looking for her.

  “Is there something bothering you?” Eric asked, studying him.

  “No. I told you I’m fine.” Carl gulped down his coffee and then stood up. “I need to head back before it gets dark.”

  Without waiting for them to answer, he went into the cabin. The women looked over at him from where they sat around the kitchen table.

  “I think we should head back,” he told Juliet as he put the empty cup on the table. “We have a long ride home, and there’s only so much sunlight left. I hope you don’t mind.”

  “No, I don’t mind,” Juliet replied then rose up from her seat.

  “I’m sorry you have to go so soon,” Caroline said while he went to get Juliet’s coat. “But I understand. I’m glad you made the trip into town.”

  He returned to Juliet and helped her slip her coat on. “Thank you for inviting us,” he told Caroline. With a glance at Allie, he said, “It was nice seeing you again.” Then he led Juliet out of the cabin and to their wagon.

  “Carl, is everything alright?” Juliet asked.

  “Everything’s fine. I just wanted to leave before it gets too late, that’s all.”

  He helped her in, barely noting the way her hand felt in his. He had to use what was left of the season and renew his efforts to find gold, and he needed to start on it tonight. If Eric found out her secret, he would be compelled to follow the letter of the law. For him, the world was black and white. There was only good and bad.

  But Carl could see the grays, and he knew that whatever Juliet had done, she’d done it because she’d had to—not because she’d wanted to. If Eric couldn’t sympathize with the situation Lydia had put Jerry in, there was no way he’d give Juliet a chance. Getting rid of the Wanted poster was only a temporary reprieve. He needed a permanent solution, and the only permanent solution he had was getting out of the country.

  Juliet waited until he was sitting beside her before asking, “Did one of the men say something to upset you?”

  “No, they were fine,” he replied. “I just want to head home, that’s all.”

  There was no sense in making her worry by letting her know their town sheriff would be content to put her in jail or let her hang for her crime. Who knew if she wouldn’t run off? And what was more, who knew if she’d even tell him? She might leave without saying anything, figuring that as long as he didn’t know where she was or what she’d done, then no one could come after him. He couldn’t risk losing her. Whatever it took, he was going to make sure they stayed together.

  “It takes longer to get to our home than it does for Allie and Travis to get to theirs,” he finally added. “I just want to make sure there’s plenty of daylight left by the time we get back.”

  “Well, it is a long trip from here to our home,” she said.

  Good. She didn’t seem to suspect he had an ulterior motive. Forcing a carefree smile, he nodded. “Right. It is.”

  Seeming content, she didn’t press him further about the issue. Relieved, he let out a sigh. Now all he had to do was make up some chore he needed to do outside, and he then could go to the stream and dig up some pay dirt to bring into the barn. He’d dig up enough of it so he could pan for gold until the temperatures dropped so low the water froze. He figured he had another month before he had to worry about that. The more gold he found, the better off they’d be by spring.

  On their way through the town, Hank stopped his leisurely walk to stare at him. Carl stiffened. Hank wouldn’t express his grievances with him while Juliet was there, would he? Fortunately, he didn’t. But even so, it wasn’t until Carl safely passed him that he was able to relax.

  “What’s his problem?” Juliet asked.

  “He blames me for Jerry’s death,” he replied. “He thinks if I had been able to control Lydia, then she wouldn’t have gone around town sleeping with as many men as she could.”

  “She was unfaithful?”

  Noting the surprise in her voice, he said, “That man who was staring at me was one of the men she was with.”

  She glanced back at Hank. “Really? But he’s so old.”

  “Well, she found something worth sleeping with.” There was no way he was going to tell her Hank was better in bed than he was. That would be too embarrassing. “He wasn’t the only one,” he continued as she turned back to face him. “I think she went from one man to another because she was always searching for something to make her happy but couldn’t find it. Even if I had found enough gold to make us rich, I don’t think it would have satisfied her.”

  “I know people like that. The more you give, the more they want. I don’t know if there’s anything you can do with people like that.”

  Her voice grew soft as she spoke, and he had a feeling she did understand what he was talking about. “There isn’t. All you can do is try to stay away from them as much as possible.” And that was one good thing Lydia had done for him. She’d spent most of her time in town.

  Jul
iet closed the distance between them and slipped her arm around his. “At least you don’t have to live with her anymore.” Then she rested her head on his shoulder as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

  He was too shocked to stop her. Yes, she’d held him in the loft, but that was only because she’d wanted to warm him up. That had been something she’d probably done on instinct. This time when she touched him, she’d done it with intent. He wasn’t quite sure what the intent was, but he knew she did it because she cared about him.

  And that was nice. Besides his mother, no one had done anything like this for him. But he couldn’t tell her this. Not without seeming weak. So he kept his mouth shut and enjoyed the fact that she didn’t let go of him for the rest of the ride home.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Juliet didn’t see much of Carl after they returned home that day. He said something about needing to take care of something and that he wouldn’t be back until late. Then, right after breakfast the next morning, he left again, and he didn’t return until it was time to eat supper.

  When he left again the following day, her curiosity was prompting her to find out what he was up to. She paced the cabin for an hour, trying to talk herself out of checking on him. He was a grown man. He had a right to do whatever he wanted. It wasn’t her place to interfere.

  Maybe if they had the kind of marriage where they could be open with each other about everything, she’d have a good reason to insist he be honest with her. But she had no such right. Not when she didn’t tell him that she’d helped her brothers steal other people’s money.

  The other part of her, the one ruled by her emotions, didn’t want to listen to logic. He was her husband. She cared about him. She had been enjoying spending the days with him. But maybe he had grown tired of her and preferred to spend time away from her. It was this thought that set off a spark of panic within her. She put on her coat, gloves, and boots then left the cabin to search for him.

  The first place she checked was the fenced area. She didn’t see Carl anywhere, but she saw the two horses eating what was left of the grass. Eyebrows furrowed, she went to the barn. She didn’t see him there, either. Maybe he was in the loft.

  “Carl?”

  She waited, but there was no reply. She called his name again, but she didn’t receive an answer. After a moment, she climbed the ladder to the loft, but when she reached the top, he wasn’t there.

  This was strange. Where was he, and what was he doing?

  She went down the ladder and thought over where he might be. The only other place she could think he might be right now would be the outhouse.

  She left the barn and went to the small wooden building. Knocking on the door, she asked, “Carl? Are you in there?”

  There was no answer, so she opened the door and saw it was just as empty as the barn had been.

  She didn’t know whether to be alarmed or not. Since the horses were still there, he hadn’t gone to town. He had to be somewhere nearby.

  “Carl?” she called out as she walked away from the outhouse. When he didn’t answer, she cupped her hands around her mouth and yelled, “Carl?”

  “Over here!”

  Relieved, she turned her attention down the path from where she’d heard his voice. Winding her way around some trees, she made it to the path that they took to get to the stream. To her surprise, he was lugging a wheelbarrow full of dirt up the path.

  She ran over to him. “I thought you were done panning for gold until spring.”

  “I got bored,” he said.

  “Why didn’t you tell me you wanted to keep panning? I would have helped you.”

  “It’s too cold.”

  She fell into step beside him. “You’re doing it.”

  “I’m used to the cold. I’ve lived here for most of my life. You came from Texas. It’s warmer down south.”

  “Well, yes, but I can always put on more clothes to keep warm.”

  “No. You should stay inside and keep warm. I don’t want you to risk getting sick.”

  “But you’re doing it. Aren’t you afraid you’ll get sick?”

  “No. I didn’t get sick any of the times you worried I would, remember? I’m used to staying in the barn where it’s cold.”

  “Are you telling me that Lydia wouldn’t let you into the cabin when it was cold outside?”

  “It was my choice to stay in the barn.”

  “That’s awful, Carl. No one should have to go through that.” Then, in case he thought he should go back to sleeping out in the barn, she added, “I hope you don’t do that now. You’re welcome to stay in the cabin with me.”

  “I know. I’m not planning to return to the loft. I just thought I’d use what nice days we have left to look for gold, that’s all.”

  “Are you going back to the stream today?”

  He nodded. “I want to get one more load of pay dirt.”

  “When I was in the barn, I didn’t see any of the bins being used.”

  “That’s because I dump out the dirt I no longer need at the end of every day.”

  Then that meant he’d been trying to keep this a secret from her. But it made no sense. Why would he do that when she was well aware that he panned for gold already? Surely, he must have known that she would have understood why he wanted to keep panning for gold, even with the chill in the air.

  “How many loads do you bring up here each day?” she asked.

  “Two or three. It depends on how much gold I find in each one.”

  “Two or three? You’re working yourself too hard.” No wonder he came back to the cabin so exhausted each night that he fell asleep right after their evening meal. “We weren’t going through the pay dirt that fast when we were doing it together. Why are you doing so much now?”

  “Because,” he hesitated then shrugged, “because it’s getting colder. There’s not as much time to do this for the rest of the year.”

  That made sense, she supposed, but it seemed to her that there was something he wasn’t telling her.

  They reached the top of the path, and he set the wheelbarrow down so he could face her. “You know how you asked me not to ask you about your past, and I’ve done that?”

  Knowing where this was going, she offered a reluctant nod.

  “I’m asking you to return the favor. I have my reasons,” he said. “I assure you that they’re good. I’m not doing anything to harm you.”

  Yes, that was what she expected him to say. “I know you wouldn’t do anything to harm me, Carl.” She released an uneasy breath. “I wish I could tell you about my past, but it’s better that I don’t.”

  “I understand. You don’t have to say anything. I don’t care about it anyway. The only thing that matters is that we’re together.”

  He loved her. He didn’t have to say it. Wanting to be with her, even if they found the gold, was all the proof she needed. Blinking back her tears, she hugged him. “I’m glad we’re together, Carl. I want to be with you, too.”

  He hesitated, as if he didn’t know how to respond, and then he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to him. It was the first time he’d made such an intimate gesture. She held him tighter, a silent message that she appreciated his willingness to open himself to her, even if the idea scared him.

  After a couple of minutes, she pulled away from him and gestured to the pay dirt. “If I can’t help you collect it at the stream, can I at least help you pan for the gold in the barn?”

  “Once I get a fire going in the barrel, it won’t be so cold.”

  Giving him a smile, she asked, “Is that a yes?”

  He returned her smile. “Alright.”

  “Good. You’re not the only one who gets bored during the day.”

  He lifted the wheelbarrow, and they headed for the barn.

  ***

  Juliet sensed that something had transitioned between them that afternoon. Carl had come out and told her he wanted to stay with her. That hadn’t been the case on their w
edding day, and at the time, she hadn’t been in the position to argue with him. What kind of woman would she be if she—an outlaw—insisted that marital vows were to be taken seriously? The law was to be taken seriously, too, but she’d snubbed her nose at it often enough in the past.

  Now, as she brushed her hair for the night, she was relieved to know that she didn’t have to treat marriage the same way she’d treated the law. There was a peace in knowing that once they struck it rich, they would still be together, especially since she had grown to care so much for him.

  These were the thoughts running through her mind as Carl came into the cabin for the night. She turned from the table where she was sitting and looked at him. “Are the horses sad to be back in the barn?”

  He chuckled as he removed his coat. “Why do you think they’re sad?”

  “If I was a horse, I’d rather be outside than stuck in the barn all night.”

  “But the barn is warm this time of year.”

  “They have thick coats.”

  “Yes, but I think they’d rather stay dry. It looks like it’s going to snow.” He hung the coat on the hook then removed his hat.

  “I kind of like the snow. It’s pretty on the tree branches.”

  “It looks alright, but it’ll make the path to the stream slippery tomorrow.”

  “You’re still going to pan for gold if it snows?”

  He went over to his blankets and started to unfold them. “The water isn’t frozen yet.”

  She frowned. She had folded those blankets because she thought now that they both knew how they felt about each other, he would be joining her in bed. Surely, knowing she loved him as he loved her should help him overcome his uncertainty when it came to being intimate with her.

  She watched as Carl set out the blankets. He sat down, took off his boots, and set them at the foot of the blankets without even glancing her way. He settled onto the bottom blanket, pulled the others on top of him, and closed his eyes, just as he’d done every other time.

  She’d already extended the invitation to her bed. So far, he hadn’t joined her, and by the looks of it, he had no intention of ever making love to her. She might not know a whole lot about marriage, but this wasn’t the kind she wanted to have for the rest of her life. If they were going to truly be husband and wife, then they should be so in every way.