To Have and To Hold Read online

Unable to hide her pleasure at his words, Mary giggled.

  While he took Jasper to the backyard, Sal y waved her forward. “Come on in.”

  Mary obeyed and took off her bonnet.

  Sal y left the door open but let the storm door shut behind her as she put her arm around

  Mary’s and led her down the hal way. “You and Dave look happy.”

  “Weren’t we happy before?” Mary wondered, surprised. She got the impression she and Dave

  already loved each other.

  “Of course, you were. He’s adored you ever since he first saw you. He says that you’re the

  best thing that’s ever happened to him.”

  Relieved, she relaxed.

  “I just meant that it’s as if you two are fal ing in love al over again, like you did when you were

  first married.”

  “I suppose that’s because I’m learning about him again.”

  Sal y sighed wistful y. “Isn’t that the most wonderful feeling in the world? I often think if I could

  just meet Rick and fal in love with him one more time, it’d be so romantic. Not that he isn’t stil

  wonderful, but there’s nothing like the first time you realize you love someone and know he

  loves you back.”

  “You’re probably right.” Mary reasoned that Sal y had to be since she was so certain about it.

  They entered the kitchen, and Sal y motioned to the pretty brunette woman who was at the

  cook stove with a coffee pot. “That’s April. Over there are her children, three-year-old Nora

  and six-month-old Tess.”

  Mary glanced at Nora who was playing dol s with Sal y’s daughter, Laura, before she looked at

  Tess who was in the highchair, content to bang two spoons together. Rachel ran over to join

  the older girls who were sitting on the floor.

  “How are you doing, Mary?” April asked.

  “Fine,” Mary replied, offering a smile to someone she knew she should know but didn’t.

  “I heard you lost your memory,” April said as she left the cook stove and walked over to the

  table where Sal y motioned for Mary to sit. As Mary obeyed, Sal y sat down and April fol owed

  suit, sitting across from Mary. “I bet it was a scary experience when you woke up and couldn’t

  remember anyone.”

  “It was,” Mary admitted.

  “Where’s Greg?” Isaac asked.

  “He’s outside with the dogs,” Sal y told him. “Do you want to play with him?”

  Isaac nodded, so Sal y said, “Take some cookies for you and Greg and go out there, but don’t

  give any to the dogs this time, alright?”

  Isaac hastened to obey, making Mary chuckle. “I don’t think he enjoys playing with girls.”

  “Al boys are like that at his age,” Sal y said. “They think girls are gross.”

  “Wel , just wait until he’s older,” April added. “He’l change his mind.”

  “And too soon,” Sal y mused. “It’s real y not fair they have to grow up.”

  “Come now, Sal y,” April began, tapping her friend on the arm, “you wouldn’t have wanted to

  stay a child forever, would you?”

  Sal y grimaced. “And have my brothers bothering me al the time? I don’t think so. I’m ever

  grateful Rick got me out of my parents’ house. But don’t worry, Mary. Your husband never

  gave me any problems. He was the only brother I could tolerate while I was growing up.”

  “Joel turned out alright, though,” April protested.

  “Yes, he did. You’re a good influence on him.” Sal y winked at Mary. “Men need wives. For

  sure, they’d never find their hats or ties if it weren’t for us. How Rick can be looking right at his

  tie in the closet and not see it, I’l never understand.”

  April giggled. “You’re awful, Sal y. Rick isn’t that bad.”

  Sal y lifted her eyebrows in a way that implied Rick was, indeed, that bad.

  “You’d be miserable without him,” April chided good-naturedly.

  “Yes, I would. Despite their quirks, husbands are good to have around.” Her eyebrows

  furrowed and she stood up and peered out the window. “I’m surprised David hasn’t left yet. He

  said he wanted to see Joel.”

  Curious, Mary eased out of her seat and joined Sal y. Dave was reading the letter her sister—

  Grace, if she remembered the name right—had written. With a sigh, she said, “I’m afraid

  there’s bad news in my family.”

  “How so?” Sal y asked, sounding alarmed.

  “My father’s taken il . He doesn’t have much longer to live,” she softly answered, unsure of how

  she felt about this. Of course, it was sad, but it felt as if she was hearing about someone

  else’s father, not someone who raised her.

  “Do you remember him?” April asked.

  “No,” Mary replied, reluctantly turning away from the window where Isaac and Greg played

  with the two dogs near Dave. She went back to her chair and sat down. “I don’t remember

  anything about my life in Maine. It’s as if I started out here, with no background.”

  Sal y turned to her in interest. “You remember your life here?”

  “Bits and pieces. I mostly get a sense of how much I liked or didn’t like something, but I get

  glimpses of sights and smel s, too. Everything that happened in Maine is a complete blank.”

  “But you’re remembering things that happened here?”

  Mary nodded.

  April tapped her fingers on the table. “I wonder if Joel’s right. He said a trip back to Maine

  might help you make a lot of progress in a short time.”

  “Yes, but it’s an expensive trip,” Sal y argued.

  “Maybe we can al pitch in and help pay for it. Considering her loss of memory and her father’s

  il ness, it’s for a good cause.”

  “We could, but who’s going to watch the farm? Rick doesn’t know the first thing about taking

  care of one.”

  “Maybe Doctor Adams wil let Joel and I stay out there until Mary and Dave come back.”

  “Dave would go with me?” Mary interrupted, immediately feeling better that she wouldn’t have

  to go back there by herself, especial y since she couldn’t remember any of the people there.

  “Of course, he would,” Sal y said. “He wouldn’t want to be away from you. Besides, if it was

  me, I’d want Rick to join me. It’s scary enough having to travel that far without your husband

  there. I don’t know how you managed the trip here without someone, and even then, you told

  me you were determined that you wouldn’t have gone back to Maine.”

  “You original y came out here as a mail-order bride, but you said if it didn’t work out, you were

  going to get a paper looking for a job as a teacher or a cook.” Sal y glanced at April. “You

  want to talk romantic? David said he took one look at her and just knew she’d make the perfect

  wife.”

  Mary hardly heard the last part of what Sal y said. Her mind was stuck on the fact that she had

  decided she wouldn’t return to Maine. Why would she make that choice? Wouldn’t it be natural

  to want to go back home if the man she came out to marry didn’t want to be with her?

  Before she could give any more thought to the matter, Sal y leaned toward the open window

  and cal ed out, “David! Come on in! We need to talk!”

  April stood up to get the coffee. “And Mary, you don’t have to worry about traveling with the

  children. Joel and I wil be happy to watch them while you and Dave are gone.”

  Sal y turned her attention back to the women and said, “I think Isaac wi
l be happier if he’s with

  Greg. Jeremy comes over when Jenny’s here, and the three play wel together.”

  They looked at Mary, and she shifted uncomfortably in her chair. Everything was happening so

  fast. Her head was spinning. She closed her eyes and tried to focus on what Sal y and April

  were suggesting.

  The kitchen door opened, and she opened her eyes in time to see Dave saunter into the room.

  With a quick glance out the window, she saw that Greg and Isaac were taking turns throwing

  sticks for the dogs to catch.

  “Sit over there,” Sal y told Dave, pointing to the seat next to Mary.

  Dave obeyed. “This is a first. Usual y, you get upset if I come back too soon.” He glanced at

  Mary and took her hand in his. “It must be my lucky day.”

  April giggled as she poured coffee into the cups resting on the worktable. “Poor Joel. Sal y

  slammed the door in his face when I first married him.”

  “Wel , he was giving you a hard time,” Sal y said as she brought over the cups to the table and

  set them in front of Dave and Mary. “David was never as difficult as Joel was. David wanted

  to be married to Mary, and he let her know it.”

  “It didn’t take Joel long to warm up to the idea of marriage,” April argued as she gave the

  children their cookies.

  Sal y brought her cup to the table and sat across from Dave and Mary. “Mary just told us that

  her father is il , and we thought it’d be a good idea if you took her back to Maine so she could

  see him and hopeful y remember what her life was like there. We thought since she’s starting

  to recal parts of her life here since she’s around us, she might remember her past if she’s

  around the people she grew up with.”

  Dave nodded. “I agree.”

  “Now before you argue how it’s going to be a long and expensive trip, we’ve figured out a way

  to buy—”

  April hurried over to Sal y and put her hand on her shoulder. “He agrees with you.”

  Sal y stopped talking and stared at Dave. “Real y?”

  He laughed and picked up his cup of coffee. “Real y.” He glanced at Mary. “ I figure if they’re

  offering, then they won’t mind watching Isaac and Rachel so we don’t have to drag them along.

  A train ride al the way to Maine is too much to ask for kids their age. Now, to figure out who’l

  take care of the farm…” He looked at Sal y.

  “We already decided I’l watch Isaac. April and Joel wil watch Rachel and manage the farm.

  The doctor wil understand,” Sal y replied.

  “Then it’s al settled.” Dave squeezed Mary’s hand. “But we won’t go if you don’t want to. I

  don’t want you to do anything you’re not comfortable with.”

  Mary knew it was a good idea, especial y since it involved seeing her father. And her husband

  would be with her, so she wouldn’t have to face a bunch of strangers alone. Taking a deep

  breath, she nodded. “I’l go.”

  Sal y clapped her hands and grinned. “Oh, how exciting! I just know your family wil be glad to

  see you again. And I think this is exactly what you need to help you get those memories back.”

  April put a plate of cookies on the table. “Sal y, it might not give Mary al of her memories

  back, but she’l get to see her family again and that’s worth going for.”

  “You’re right,” Sal y agreed, “but I hope it gives Mary her memories back.”

  “Either way, I think it’l be a good thing,” Dave said. “And it’l be nice to see my in-laws.”

  Mary glanced from one person to another and took in their hopeful expressions. It seemed

  strange that, even without her memories, she felt a hesitation about the whole thing. But she

  had a nagging suspicion that, soon enough, she’d discover why.

  Chapter Eight

  A week later as Dave and Mary waited in the train station to leave Omaha, Mary waited for

  Dave to check in their luggage. She got a vague sense of being in the station before. Curious,

  she strol ed over to the corner near the newsstand and stared at a bench. There was

  something important about this area of the station. Intrigued by the stirring of an emotional

  memory, she sat on the bench and glanced around the space, noting that she was out of the

  way from the main traffic of people as they got ready to board. The train wasn’t there yet but

  would be soon.

  She cleared her throat and shifted on the bench, feeling strangely awkward to be alone in a

  crowded place. She shouldn’t feel awkward. Being alone wasn’t anything to feel awkward

  about, but she did feel awkward. Awkward and lonely. And, if she was right, hurt. It seemed

  to her that she was recal ing a time in her past when she didn’t have anyone in her life that she

  could turn to.

  She closed her eyes, aware that tears fil ed them even as she was determined she wouldn’t

  cry. Resisting the urge to dig her nails into the palm of her hands, she crossed her arms and

  tried to figure out what happened in her past to spur on the strong negative emotions she was

  now experiencing.

  “There you are,” someone said.

  Startled, she opened her eyes and saw Dave walking toward her. He halted for a moment,

  smiled and then continued coming her way until he reached her. Sitting next to her, he said,

  “For a moment there, I thought I was seeing you for the first time.”

  She furrowed her eyebrows. “You did?”

  He nodded. “We met this way. You were so lovely. You were sitting here on the bench, and I

  came over to talk to you.”

  At his words, an image flashed through her mind. “Was there a newspaper?”

  Looking excited, he nodded. “Do you remember anything else?”

  Surprised by his enthusiasm, she careful y thought over what glimpses she was receiving. A

  newspaper was in his hands. He was smiling at her. The hurt she felt ebbed. “I remember

  you made me feel better about something.”

  His smile faltered for a bit. “Wel , yes, there was a man who was rude to you.”

  “Was there?” That explained the negative emotions she recal ed.

  Taking her hand in his, he said, “This was where I asked you to marry me.”

  She wondered why he didn’t tel her more about the rude man, but by the way he was looking

  at her, she realized his mind was on his proposal. She decided to let the rude man go from

  whatever memory had been tugging at her. “You asked me to marry you the same day we

  met?”

  “I did. You came off the train as a mail-order bride.”

  “But I didn’t come for you?” she asked, surprised. She assumed by the way Sal y talked, she

  came to be with Dave, but by the underlying bitter tone in his voice, she realized that wasn’t the

  case.

  “You were meant to come for me.”

  Her eyebrows furrowed. “I came as a mail-order bride but I didn’t come to marry you?”

  “Wel , no. You came because you answered someone else’s ad for a wife, but that doesn’t

  matter.” His voice took a lighter tone as he continued, “We were meant to be together. I don’t

  believe in coincidences. I happened to be at the mercantile when the man said he was coming

  here to get his mail-order bride, and I was thinking of placing an ad for one myself. I tagged

  along to see what a mail-order bride was like. Then I saw you and knew you would be the right

  one for me.”

  “You knew that just
by looking at me?”

  “Alright, there was a little more to it than that. I saw how you were treating other people, too.”

  “And then what?” she asked, wanting to know more about the day that made them husband

  and wife. The more he talked, the more she became aware of the impression she had of him

  that day—that he was a kind man who was able to see past how she appeared to the world

  and see her as she truly was.

  “I came over here, introduced myself and asked you to marry me.”

  “Just like that?”

  “Pretty much.” In a teasing tone, he added, “You didn’t say yes right away. I think you wanted

  to play hard to get.”

  “Oh, surely I don’t play such games.” She couldn’t imagine saying no to him.

  “I wouldn’t say you were playing a game with me. You were merely letting me pursue you.”

  Her face warmed at the thought of flirting with him, but she shrugged and said, “It seems to me

  you ran pretty fast if you caught me.”

  He chuckled. “Even so, it took me ten minutes.”

  “That isn’t long.”

  “It is when I could have had you say yes in five.”

  “You can’t begrudge a woman ten minutes for wanting to be pursued by a suitor.”

  “You’re right. I can’t. I’m just glad you didn’t make me wait fifteen minutes, or worse, go back

  to Maine and make me post an ad and hope you’d answer it.”

  “That’s sil y. It makes no sense I’d go through al that trouble to only turn around and come

  back.”

  “And you were sensible enough to understand that back then.” He kissed her cheek. “See why

  I had to marry you?” Standing up, he held his hand out to her. “The train’s due any minute

  now. Are you ready?”

  She took his hand and paused. “You made a joke,” she slowly recal ed. “When I told you I

  wasn’t as thin as other women, you said something about that being good because it meant the

  wind wouldn’t blow me away from your land.”

  He nodded. “That’s right. You laughed. You can always tel a marriage wil be good if the

  woman can laugh at your jokes.” After she stood up, he slipped her arm around his and led her

  toward the platform. “You have a wonderful laugh.”

  “I can’t get married alone,” she said, recal ing another glimpse from the past. “We were about