The Bargain Mail Order Bride Read online

  Picking up on a new topic, Juliet asked him, “What places have you been to?”

  From there, the preacher went into a detailed account about all of the places he’d visited. She hadn’t expected him to do that, but it suited her just fine. As long as he wasn’t going to focus on how familiar she seemed, she was more than willing to listen to him ramble, even if he was—as Carl put it—boring.

  By the time Caroline said they should get going, Juliet was in danger of drifting off to sleep. Face flushed, she straightened up and took another drink of the coffee that had long ago turned cold. If she’d been thinking correctly, she would have drunk it all at once. Maybe then, she wouldn’t have almost fallen asleep.

  “Well, thank you for stopping by,” Juliet said as she stood up.

  “I hope you won’t be a stranger,” Caroline told her. “You and Carl can visit me and Eric anytime. Around here, we’re one big family.”

  “That’s the benefit of a small town,” the preacher said. “People know each other.”

  It was a good thing Caroline and the preacher had their backs turned to Carl because Carl grimaced.

  The preacher gave her his empty cup then smiled at her. “There’s nothing like the first year of marriage. You’re about to have a wonderful adventure of the heart.”

  “That’s a lovely way of putting it, Preacher,” Caroline said, her smile wide.

  Carl shook his head but quietly gathered the chairs so he could take them back to the barn.

  “Oh, I almost forgot to give you my cup!” Caroline handed her the cup. “Your coffee is better than mine. Thank you for making it.”

  “Thank you for the cookies,” Juliet replied.

  Juliet wasn’t a fan of extended good-byes, and the fact that Caroline and the preacher spent the next ten minutes congratulating her and Carl on their marriage before finally getting into the wagon left her feeling exhausted.

  Carl came back out. “I didn’t think they’d ever leave.”

  “I don’t see how you suffered,” she teased as she took his cup. “You left me alone with them for the last ten minutes.”

  “That’s exactly why I left,” he replied. “I didn’t want to listen to how wonderful everything is.” She couldn’t be sure, but she thought his lips curled up ever so slightly as he added, “One would swear this place is full of unicorns and singing butterflies with the way they talk.”

  She shot him an amused look. “Singing butterflies?”

  “According to them, this place is a fairytale.”

  “Yes, I suppose they do make it out to be that way.” She glanced up at the sky. “They stayed longer than I expected. I should get started on supper. What would you like to eat this evening?”

  He shrugged. “Anything you make is fine.”

  After a moment, she realized they’d run out of things to say, so she offered him a nod and went to the cabin. She still wasn’t sure what to make of her new husband, but he hadn’t told the preacher or Caroline anything that could incriminate her. He’d even steered the conversation away from her when the preacher tried to figure out why she looked familiar. Carl had no idea how much she appreciated the fact that he’d done that.

  Or maybe he did. It seemed to her that in some ways they were working together as a team. He was willing to do whatever he could to keep her secrets safe, and in return, she was doing her part to help him reach his goals. It was an unspoken pact, but it was a pact all the same.

  This was the first time she’d ever felt like someone had put her interests before his own. And it made her think very well of him.

  Chapter Seven

  Carl knew the preacher meant well, but he wished the man wouldn’t keep extolling the virtues of marriage. He knew what had happened with Lydia. Everyone in town knew about it. And one would think that because of that, he would have kept his mouth shut.

  But worse than all of that, Carl hadn’t gotten as much panning done as he had hoped. Even with Juliet’s help, he only managed to retrieve about four flakes of gold by the time Juliet called out that supper was ready. After he put the flakes in the jar he kept hidden in the barn, he began to feel the familiar despair welling up within him.

  It was September. Soon it would be too cold to pan for gold, and that meant he’d have to spend another winter in this godforsaken place. Another winter trapped like a prisoner. When his father brought him and his mother here, he’d promised them they would only be here for a year. Then a year turned into two. And two turned into three. And before long, Carl had spent an entire twenty-four years of his life in this town. Always trying to get out. Never being able to.

  It was an endless cycle of hope and despair. Every spring, he was determined he would be long gone by the time winter came. But as soon as autumn rolled around and he didn’t get enough gold, he knew this wouldn’t be the year he could leave.

  What if his mother had been right? What if they would both be stranded here until the day they died?

  “Carl?”

  Turning from the table where he’d slipped the gold under, he faced Juliet, who stood in the entrance of the barn. Once again, she was wearing pants and the braids.

  “Did you hear me tell you that supper is ready?” Juliet asked.

  “Yes,” he replied. “I was just putting the gold away.”

  Her eyes lit up as she came over to him. “How much did you find?”

  “Four flakes.” Then, since she seemed interested, he bent down to retrieve the jar from under the table. “I only got through two pan’s worth of pay dirt today because the preacher and Caroline came out here.”

  She accepted the jar from him and inspected it.

  Sadly, it was only an inch worth of gold flakes. “I think we’ll have enough to get through the winter. After you buy food and hay, there’s not a lot left over.”

  “Did this take you all year to acquire?”

  “That’s half of what I got this year. Lydia would find the jar and take some of the gold to buy things.” He never could seem to find a good enough hiding place for the jar. The woman was much too good at sniffing it out. “I tried to explain to her that the more you spend, the less money you’ll have if you want to get out of this town, but I might as well have been arguing with the wind.”

  “Sometimes the urge to satisfy a moment’s desire can rob a person of the future.”

  Noting the thoughtful tone in her voice, he wondered where her mind had gone. Was she referring to herself or to someone else?

  She handed him the jar. “Is there any way we can get a lot of gold in the rest of the month?”

  “It’s possible, but highly unlikely. The spring is the best time to get gold.”

  “Really?”

  He put the jar back under the table. “There’s more water in the stream from the melting snow, and the current can bring in more gold.”

  “Well, maybe next spring, we’ll get enough gold to leave town. In the meantime, I’ll use what’s left of the year to learn how to pan for it.”

  He supposed there was that. Maybe the rest of the month wasn’t going to be wasted after all.

  “Are you ready to eat?” she asked. “I made soup. Caroline might burn it, but I don’t.”

  Despite the frustration of not being able to get more gold that day, he found his mood improving at the reminder. “No one can burn soup. I think she was lying in order to stop the preacher and me from fighting.”

  “I don’t know. She seemed awfully serious when she said it.”

  “That could be her way. I hear she came from a wealthy household. Those women are brought up to keep the peace no matter what it takes.”

  And he knew that all-too-well since his mother had come from money. She’d gone along with most of the things his father had wanted because it wasn’t in her nature to argue. Her place had been to do whatever he wanted, even if it ended up killing her in the end.

  “Carl, are you alright?” Juliet asked, her voice soft.

  Surprised by her gentle tone, he s
tiffened. No one had talked to him so tenderly since his mother was alive. Clearing his throat, he said, “I’m fine. I’m just tired. Every time I listen to the preacher, I feel like I can sleep for years.”

  “Yes, he made me tired, too.” Then, after a moment, she asked, “Could you tell I almost fell asleep?”

  “No. You looked like you were paying attention to him.”

  “Good. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings.” She turned to leave then glanced his way. “Are you coming?”

  Once again, he’d have to eat with her. He should have expected that this was going to become a common occurrence. Very few people would understand why he and Lydia never ate together, and he decided he wasn’t going to tell her that’s what he’d been used to. That might lead to questions he’d rather not answer. Besides, all he wanted to do was go through one more pan before he quit for the day. The sooner he ate, the sooner he could do that.

  So he went with her to the cabin, trying not to think about how strange it was to be doing so much with another person. Juliet seemed to assume they would be doing a lot of things together. Not that he wasn’t still grateful for her help with gold panning. He could use the help, and he was glad she’d pitched in to do it.

  But just how much did she think they would do together, and how was it going to change his life? Up to now, he had assumed getting another wife wouldn’t be all that different from having Lydia around.

  The two went into the cabin, and he saw that she’d already set out their bowls and fresh cups of coffee on the small table. Perhaps if the cabin wasn’t so small, he wouldn’t feel so restricted.

  “Have a seat,” she told him. “I’ll be right back with something.”

  Releasing his breath, he sat in the chair he’d used that morning. This wasn’t going to be any easier than it’d been at breakfast. The cabin had so many memories in it. Whether it reminded him of his mother’s constant weeping or Lydia’s constant bickering, they were hard to ignore. How was he supposed to act like nothing bad ever happened here?

  Juliet came over to him, breaking him out of the past. “I don’t know if I found all of the gold flakes in my pan or not, but I have three.”

  His gaze went to her palm where the yellow flakes sparkled up at him in the remaining sunlight coming in through the window.

  “I saved the rest of the dirt in the pan,” she added. “I thought it would be best if you went through it again. Just to make sure I got everything.”

  Surprised, he looked up at her. He’d forgotten she’d brought her pan in here when the preacher and Caroline came by. She could have easily slipped them into her trunk and saved them for herself. But she was offering them to him. If he hadn’t been so overcome with shock, he might have known what to say.

  “Well, maybe I should put it aside for now,” she said and walked over to the shelf. She took a small saucer and put the flakes on it. Then she returned to him and set the saucer by his bowl. “There. That will keep until you’re ready to put them in the jar.”

  She sat across from him and smiled before she started eating her soup.

  He glanced back at the saucer. Between the three flakes she’d found and the four he’d found, the day suddenly didn’t seem like such a waste.

  “You found three on your first try?” he asked.

  As soon as he’d asked the question, he felt silly. The answer was obvious. Of course, she had. Otherwise, the three flakes wouldn’t be beside him right now.

  “Was that alright?” she asked, looking up from her soup with a worried frown on her face.

  “It’s more than alright,” he hurried to assure her. “Considering it’s your first day doing this, it’s really good.”

  “Oh.” A smile lit up her face. “Thank you.”

  Then she returned her attention to the soup.

  Figuring that was the end of their conversation, he lifted the spoon and dipped it into the soup, trying not to notice the way his hand shook. He didn’t know if he’d ever be able to relax while he ate with her. Eating seemed like such a personal thing to do with another person in the room.

  It hadn’t always been that way. In Boston, he had brief memories of being at ease in the presence of others. But there was something about being out here that made everything feel awkward. And for the life of him, he didn’t know how to make that sensation go away. All he could do was press through it and hope Juliet didn’t notice.

  Strengthening his resolve, he focused on eating his supper. They spent the time in silence, and before long, he was finished. After thanking her, he promised he’d put the gold she’d found in the jar and hurried to the barn to do just that. It wasn’t until he was feeding the horses that he finally began to relax.

  Hopefully, things wouldn’t always be this way. Juliet was making an effort to be nice. She wasn’t like Lydia. He just wished he could learn to enjoy the change.

  ***

  Juliet fully expected Carl to come to bed. She had undressed and waited for him. But as the minutes passed into an hour, and the hour passed into more, she realized he wasn’t going to try for a child that night. She wasn’t all that surprised. Not when he’d had such a difficult time getting through the process the previous night.

  She knew it didn’t have to be something men had to dread. Her brothers had made it no secret they enjoyed it, though they would have panicked if one of those women came back with word that they had fathered a child.

  She probably shouldn’t let her imagination entertain thoughts on how Lydia had twisted things around so Carl hated it. Well, hate was probably too strong of a word. He had received some pleasure from it. For the brief moment when he had climaxed, all of his defenses had gone down, and then he had let her hold him. Every other time, he had shied away from her touch, as if he was afraid she’d hurt him. But for one moment, he had actually seemed to welcome it.

  The poor man. It only made her want to put her arms around him and hold him, but she didn’t think he would allow it. He was much too closed off because of the damage Lydia had done.

  When the morning came, these thoughts were still on her mind, but it was time to go through the day’s chores so she forced them aside. She put on the same shirt and pants she’d worn the day before, figuring they would pan for more gold. She made pancakes since he had enjoyed them so much then went out to tell him breakfast was ready.

  This time when she found Carl, he was taking a horse out to the small fence behind the barn. He ran his hand along the mane and spoke to the animal in a tone so low she couldn’t make out what he was saying. The horse neighed in response and nudged his shoulder in a playful manner.

  She smiled. Carl had a wall around him that made it hard to figure him out, so it was nice to get this glimpse into his personality.

  He glanced her way, and almost immediately, the wall came back up. It was a shame he worried she didn’t accept him. But then, she shouldn’t be surprised. She had her own wall that he couldn’t get through any more than she could get through his. What an odd pair they made. Or, perhaps, they complemented each other perfectly.

  She cleared her throat and called out, “It’s time to eat!”

  He offered her a nod. “I’ll be there in a couple of minutes.”

  Since there was nothing for her to do, she returned to the cabin and set out some pancakes on his plate before putting a couple on hers. She’d prepared breakfast many times for her brothers, but it was different when she did it for her husband. It felt more intimate somehow.

  When she was a girl, she had often imagined what it’d be like to be married. Down in Texas, there was no chance of that happening. Not with her background. But here, she had a clean slate. She could finally be the woman she’d expected to be when she was a child, and that was a freeing experience.

  Carl came into the cabin just as she finished pouring coffee into their cups. With a smile, she nodded toward his chair. “Go on and have a seat. I’ll join you in a moment.”

  Once she put the coffee pot back on the coo
kstove, she picked up two small pieces of peppermint she’d found in one of the jars along the shelf. “Would you like one of these in your coffee?” She showed him the peppermints.

  His eyebrows furrowed. “You put that in coffee?”

  “Sometimes. It adds a little flavor to it.”

  After a moment, he shrugged. “Why not?”

  She slipped the peppermint into both of their cups then sat across from him. “Will we do more gold panning today?”

  “Are you sure you want to do that?”

  “I had fun yesterday. It was especially fun when I actually found gold. It was like searching for treasure.”

  He seemed to think over her comment then nodded. “I suppose it is like searching for treasure.”

  “It is. I saw it as an adventure.”

  To this comment, he chuckled. “I never thought of it as an adventure. To me, it always seemed like a chore.”

  Yes, she supposed it would. He’d been doing it for a lot longer than her. “Maybe things will turn around. You’ve been doing honest work all those years. It’s bound to pay off.”

  Her brothers would have laughed at such a thing, saying that only a fool would waste time getting gold like Carl did, but she liked to believe hard work would be rewarded.

  “I hope so,” Carl replied as he cut into his pancakes. “Otherwise, I won’t have anything to show for all the years I was alive.”

  “Well, you have me to help you now,” she said. “I don’t mind the work.”

  From there, they fell into silence and ate their meal.

  Chapter Eight

  Carl and Juliet fell into a routine over the next two weeks, and Carl found comfort in it. He’d wake up in the barn loft and take care of the horses. Juliet would tell him when breakfast was ready. After eating, they would get more pay dirt from the stream and haul it up to the barn.